One of the most difficult tasks in life is removing someone from your heart. I guess that might be true in some cases. I can assure you of this, if a dude comes home and finds all his stuff thrown out into the yard with folks rummaging through the same stuff because of a misunderstanding, then it's easy to remove some "someone’s" from your heart, life, bed, garage...you get the picture. I had a very close friend who had a woman that drove him crazy, he thought, but in a good way. He called me after a few months of dating to say he was going to ask her to marry him, even though she was missing something off her combination plate mentally. In the months they had been dating, she had pulled a knife on his ex-girlfriend at a bar (just to warn her that he was no longer available), had called the last three girls he had dated and threatened them all just on general purposes. She was gorgeous and as nutty as a big industrial sized bag of peanut M&M's. I warned him not to marry her or even think about maintaining the relationship much longer, which kinda pissed him off at me. That all changed when she was so overcome with jealousy that she stalked him at his work, "caught" him talking to another female co-worker and she went, as my dad puts it, "ape shit". Little did she know he was talking to the CFO of the company, and that the company employee manual stated that any employee having a fiancĂ©e who intrudes the work place and threatens a company officer meant a job loss for said employee(or something like that) even if you've been with the same company for fifteen years. When my buddy got home, his stuff was tossed in the yard too, at the house he owned, with complementary bullet holes shot in his TV, stereo, DVD player, clothes, and the rest of his dude accoutrement (fancy french word for his "stuff"). I assured him that any relationship is at a serious crossroads when guns (or knives) are utilized as a means of expressing ones displeasure, relationship wise. I also warned him that the next time the bullets of displeasure might come flying when his favorite shirt was still being worn by him. It was east to remove her from his heart, but not any other aspect of his life. A restraining order and the local police on speed dial helped with the rest.
Resentment hurts you, not them. Resentment can be used constructively or destructively, depending on the need, to get someone out of your life permanently. Sometimes a good old fashioned dose of resentment helps get much needed distance between you and whomever you are resenting. Remember the life-long friend I told you about, the one who told me after two years in the hospital, the "You shoulda known I was your friend because I wasn't hitting on your wife while you were in the hospital"friend? He resented the fact that I terminated our friendship after 21 years plus the two years he resisted propositioning my lovely bride. He actually thought he was doing me a favor! It made me realize one undeniable truth. Some friendships are like tires...they just wear out.
Silence and a half smile can hide a lot of pain from the world. I guess this works from a female's take on life. Most dudes can't and don't hide the fact that they are pissed off about something. On the rare occasions I do get pissed, I know that I don't. Someone pisses me off? I give them a lot of time and space to think things over. I've heard that silence is a form of abuse, and that was obviously written by a liberal or a woman. It takes a lot to get on my bad side, but when you finally arrive, there is a bed and breakfast awaiting you. You might as well make yourself comfortable because when your train has pulled into the "pissed me off" station, you'd have better brought a lot of outfits because you are going to be there a while. I'm a forgiving soul and I cherish my friendships, but do not cross that line with me. I've been around a while and know when I'm getting played, used, lied to or abused. After fifty plus years of making friends and losing friends, my true friends know not to, and I give them the same courtesy in return. Have you ever heard the term "I'm a people person!"...well I am too, but don't piss me off. I'm my own best company.I can turn a dick-weed personality off like a cheap 100 watt light bulb burning at midnight, and besides, life is too short to be pissed off all the time. So, hey, let’s be friends! Can I get a witness?
True love comes when manipulation stops. Really? Tell that to a kid. Kids are the biggest manipulators on the planet. I guess it's in the natural order of things but it still stinks. Kids will tell their parents "I'm an outcast because I don't wear Abercrombie and Fitch clothes, or I don't have an I-Phone, and I don't drive a BMW", and parents actually fall for this shit! I'm going to give a "when I was in school speech" right here and now. When I was in school, any car was a cool car. Two door, four door, station wagon, grandma's old ride, smoking tail pipes, busted muffler, no air-conditioning, bald tires, it didn't matter. Every car, if it ran, was a cool car. It was even cooler if you had and eight track tape player or picked up FM radio. Clothes consisted of Levi's, tee-shirts and Chuck Taylor specials or P.F. Flyers. Playing sports was a privilege, you didn't date any of your buddies ex-girlfriends, ever, and if a dude had his zipper down, you tell him "Dude law states I have to tell you your zipper is down" and it was cool. It is indeed different times we find ourselves in. Remember, manipulative kids become manipulative grown-ups. And nobody like getting played.
Even the best relationships don’t last forever. I guess the last installment is as true as true gets. Death comes to everything. Friendships, marriages, pets, cars, jobs, homes, kids....everything. Not physical death mind you, that's an inevitable truth we'll all face unless science comes up with something only rich folk can afford. Who would want to live forever any way. When I was younger, I thought technology would be a great thing. But look at what it has done. Kids don't like to play outside any more. When I was a kid a punishment worse than death was to be kept indoors for a dastardly deed one committed, intentional or not. Now? A kid will call DFACS or the ACLU (on the new I-phone you bought them) if he or she is sent outside "to play". Too much information has made the kid fatter, made him less sociable, and more manipulative. You parents who won't make your kid go outside every day to play? Get your Abercrombie and Fitch credit card handy, your I-Phone store mapped out on the free GPS 'app', and brush up on your German, because BMW has a four-tired cure-all for your child's social shortcomings. But remember not to clutter up your basement with too much of his or her old stuff. He or she will need a place to live for the next twenty years. Oh, and be prepared to take the blame for not "making" them get out and get a life.
You have a good day now, ya hear?
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